I am super passionate about creativity. And for a long time I didn’t know why. It spoke to me… awakened something within that I felt the urge to follow – without question. And I did just that.
I begin to study colour therapy – I am a seeker after all. I dived into the world of colour and in one assignment for my studies, I am asked to blindfold myself and intuitively select colours to draw with while listening to music. I am transported into another world and I spend hours on this exercise rather than the required 30 minutes. I. AM. HOOKED.
I continue searching for more creative things to occupy my energy. I sign up for a year long online art course and I partake in a beautiful weekly practice called Make Art Mondays where I paint intuitively to a one word theme for the fun of it. Let me just repeat that… FOR. THE. FUN. OF. IT. Something that has been absent from my life for quite some time (years at this stage)
The deeper I dive into this practice, the more I throw caution to the wind. I am no longer concerned about whether or not I am doing it the “RIGHT” way. I just stick to doing it my way. And all my beliefs and misconceptions I have about myself fall to the side. I am no longer saying
“Oh I’m not creative”
“I’m not artistic”
“I can’t draw/paint/sew/(insert any other creative activity here) to save myself.”
I’ve even forgotten the criticism of my high school art teacher or my university lecturers…even my inner mean girl has piped down…she’s having too much fun getting her paint on.
Next thing a friend of mine asks me to do a painting of her children in a style I am developing (thanks to my year long art course) and instead of balking at the suggestion, I dive in head first – because it sounds like fun… FUN … there’s that word again! I even still thought it would be fun when she mentioned it would hang on her living room wall for everyone to admire. Why Not? I thought … followed immediately by “who is this new me?”
So 4 years down the track and I am looking back on the benefits of this creative path I’ve followed, this meandering journey to just “give it a try” just “for the fun of it”. And of course I’ve run out of fingers and toes to count these benefits on…but let me try to summarise it for you.
Inner Peace
Creativity (which for me is painting or crystal beading or sewing) – puts me in a meditative state where the outside world vanishes and everything slows down and deepens – my mind, my heart rate, my breath. My muscles lose their tension – headaches disappear and I am suspended in another world.
Clarity
Following on from a sense of inner peace, I am able to gain clarity on many things. I am an over thinker – often in my head – always trying to sort things out. My friends and family describe me as Hyper vigilant – especially when it comes to my kids. So I am always preparing for every outcome – and have multiple plans of attack at the ready – which needless to say is EXHAUSTING. But my creative practice gives me the space to see what is really important and the best plan of attack (if indeed attack is what is required). It actually stops me from thinking for awhile and lets my brain make it’s connections (the ones it can actually make without my hyper vigilant input).
Self Expression
As I grew into my adult self, I lost my ability to express my true self. Once I took on the financial and emotional responsibilities of becoming a wife and a mum, I all but lost the ability to hear what my soul truly wanted. When I paint, the colours are like a treasure map back to my true self. I get clear messages of intentions that I need to set to light up my soul and move forward on my true path It has also allowed me to step into just being me – without too many concerns as to whether or not I would still fit in. I no longer dressed like everyone else… I dressed to bring myself joy and to express who I truly am – head to toe in colour.
Growth and Momentum
Over the past 4 years, I have experienced some life challenges that have left me reeling. I have dipped my toes in the pool of depression and felt the grip of anxiety – often at the same time. At times both the sensation of sinking and the tightening panic would flood over me and leave me feeling adrift. By showing up to my creative practice during these times the Inner Peace, Clarity and Self Expression would all help to chip away at the darkness and allow the light back in. For this reason alone, I am truly grateful of what creativity has done for me.
