A strange phenomenon
It would appear to be one of stealth.
Although if I look back I can see it beginning over two weeks ago now. The pain in my back and neck. The ache in my jaw. Some seemingly random conversations that have woven their energy in and around my soul.
And each new days brings me closer and closer to this day
my place of constriction
– as though I am pushing up against a road block.
An invisible road block.
And as I have felt the space contract around me, I have struggled against it.
Find the answer.
Work out what it is.
And work out how to get around it and move forward.
Get past it.
Go. Go. GO!
I’m at a crossroads – where to from here?
As one stage is wrapping up and there are a few paths ahead of me – the decision has left me immobilised. An invisible roadblock. I can’t see it and I can’t define it and I’ve tried so hard over the past few days, that the air bags have gone off in my head. There is nothing but white noise going on in there. And a big bag filled with air that has expanded into every inch of my mind is crowding out any connection to my inner voice.
I keep getting the message to “standstill”.
So I am.
Standing. Still.
But how to stay this course when my introverted self wants to pack up and head for the hills? – or even worse back to a corporate job and back to working for someone else?
Stand Still. Still. and Still.
Have you felt it too?
That sense of being stuck and the more you try and work out how to get around it or move forward, the further away from ease and freedom you feel?
I have formulated a set of ideas I am testing – not about how to move forward – but how to stand still- how to stay this course and not run.
A tool box of sorts – for my soul.
An air pipe to let the oxygen in. To keep my feet planted strongly on the ground and to hold my self in the face of this unknown, unarticulated fear. And so I share it with you in the hope that it may help you stay your course if you falter.
Step One – Get out of your Head and into your Body. Anything that clears your head and gets you back in touch with your body – whether it be a round of conscious breathing, yoga, running, pilates, meditation, massage, dancing or other forms of movement. Even just 5 minutes practice of being present in your body when, and how often you can manage. Direct your energy away from your mind. Let it cool down a little and give it some space. Space for the ego to step aside and space for your true self to get back in the drivers seat.
Step Two – Move from your Body into your Heart this is your chance to take stock of all the things you have already achieved towards your goal. Those things that got you on this path. Celebrate yourself with a self – gratitude list. Go from the general to the specific – start with the big things you have done- right down to the little things – those things you automatically do without even noticing. And if like me you have an especially tricky day, some of the things to be grateful for may include – managing to get out of bed, getting your hair washed and shoes on the right feet, kids in uniform, and lunches made and kids to school on time. And right there – there is enough to be thankful for. Take it easy on yourself. Be kind to yourself – don’t cause anymore constriction in your life if you are already facing some. The Stand Still is not meant to be an opportunity to beat yourself up.
Step Three – Offload for Clarity this one can be difficult if you are used to handling everything yourself and you don’t like to ask for help. The magic of sharing your circumstances/feelings with someone, is that the burden will lift and ease a little. You no longer feel isolated and as stuck as you do when dealing with it on your own. And even more space will open up. If you have a trusted friend you can share with them how you are feeling. You don’t even need them to solve anything for you. Sometimes the very act of verbalising can give you clarity – even without their input. If this isn’t an option for you, seek outside help. A coaching session could make all the difference in the world (speaking from experience). And the calibre of life coaches out there is amazing. Or maybe try something different with an intuitive reading to gain some clarity.
Step Four – Resonate and Retain I relate this last step to a vision board of sorts. It’s a research project where either going through your journals, or blogs that you follow or even surfing instagram for phrases and ideas that resonate with you – make you feel lighter- hit you right in the sweet spot – and then printing them off and pasting them around the place affirmation style. Here’s a few I’ve collected in the past few days:
“Darkness always finds the light” Danielle LaPorte (truth bombs)
“Clarity comes from Engagement Not Thought” Marie Forleo
“Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I’ll try again tomorrow.” Mary Anne Radmacher
“When both feet are in the door, magic happens” Rachelle from My Saturn Epoch
So tell me – what special tools do you have in your arsenal to stay your course when faced with blocks of any kind? Invisible or not? I’d love to hear from you in the comments – as always your views and ideas are inspirational to me.
Oh Lisa, this post! I really resonated with this one. Life can be tricky sometimes, huh? I’ve had to learn a few of these tricks myself – especially your step one. As someone who spends a lot of time in my head (thinking) and heart (emotional), learning to ground down into my body has been hard, but so very rewarding.
Thanks Kylie! So glad it hit the spot for you. There’s definitely a lot to be said for thinking and feeling but without being – it just doesn’t work. X
Such an emotive piece Lisa! So true that the journey from head to heart and into ourselves wholly is a long and winding path. Thank you xxoo
Thanks lovely Rachelle, and thanks for inspiring me along the way. X
I friggin’ love this post! Filled with so many pearls of wisdom. I’m going to send it to one of my clients.
I do a lot of the thing you mentioned especially the get out of your head and into your body, and talking to someone else. I always try to take it back to my ‘Why’. I also make sure I do at least one thing from my Self Love Menu (from Melissa Ambrosini). 🙂
Thanks so much Morgan! Glad you stopped by – and glad you think one of your clients will get something out of it too! I love the “WHY” prompt – and I’m going to go and check out the Self Love Menu idea of Melissas. <3
Tool box for the soul – we all need one of those! Love this post Lisa xx
Thanks Lyndsey – I’m sure there are a few more tools that could go in there too – what a joy to have the rest of our lives to discover them! Thanks for coming to visit.
Your 4 steps are beautiful reminders of what it takes to come back to ourselves, to really reconnect with who we are, so that we can move forward when we’re all connected again and ready. It does really take stopping and just being with ourselves. Thank you for outlining them so nicely!
Thanks Amira – I love how after writing this post, I head on over to yours and find yet another tool to help me get back to it – back to me! xx
I spent yesterday out in nature and felt so much better, not planning things or stressing or thinking but just enjoying the moment with my daughter. It made me realize the importance of stillness being such a powerful changemaker in its own right.
Sounds beautiful Elizabeth. You can’t best Mother Nature and time with your children to bring a sense of peace and calm and presence.
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